


think with your heart

by pendules



Category: World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: First Kiss, Fluff, M/M, Reunions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-11
Updated: 2017-10-11
Packaged: 2019-01-16 02:06:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12333294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pendules/pseuds/pendules
Summary: He forgets sometimes, that Dean missed this too — the easy touches and casual intimacy. Maybe it's easier to forget, so that he won't ever ask for too much and ruin the trust between them that still feels so fragile, even when every instinct in his body is telling him that this is more right than anything else in the world. It's easier to rely on rationality. At least when it comes to Dean's heart. It's safer this way.





	think with your heart

**Author's Note:**

> Set during/after RAW 09/10/2017.

_Five years._ It's still strange to be here, in the place where it all started. It feels like that was a million years ago. Like it happened to someone else. He wonders if he had any clue back then what would become of him, of them. That five years and a couple broken hearts and one lost soul and a quest for redemption and an apology or two later, he'd be right back here, staring at a wall and wondering if this is all actually real.

But to be fair, he's spent a lot of time the last couple months wondering if this is all really happening. Because he never would've dreamt that he'd have this back. Having it the first time was almost too good to be true. Too good to _last_ , he was sure of that. And now it feels like an illusion that can all too easily be shattered if he just makes one wrong move — And he doesn't want that. God, that's the last thing he wants — he just wants _them_ , he wants Dean and he wants Roman, safe and whole and together. Everything else is inconsequential.

"What are you doing, man?" comes Dean's unmistakable voice and it startles him for a second.

Dean's looking at him with the most perplexed expression, which probably isn't unwarranted, given that he's been sitting motionless in the same spot, staring at nothing at all, totally spaced out for the last ten minutes at least.

"Nothing," Seth says, shaking off all the remnants of nostalgia and regret and everything in between. "Just thinking."

Dean seems to assess that for a second or two before simply saying, "You think too much."

He's not wrong, really. Thinking too much was supposed to be his protection. Logic was his shield, against every potential scenario and every possible outcome. He always had a plan, always had an _out_. He never imagined that his bond with Dean and with Roman would be strong enough to cast that aside. Sometimes, logic isn't the right answer. Sometimes, you just need to feel what you feel and to hell with everything else. Sometimes, what you know in your heart may not make any sense, but it's the most important thing. Thinking too much can be dangerous. He learnt that lesson the hard way. It's funny, how he always seems to end up being the architect of his own downfall.

*

Every time Roman catches his eyes, it's like he's silently reasserting the promise he made to him days before. There was a time when he wouldn't dare look at either of them, because they would _know_ , they _always_ knew. They'd see through all the lies — they'd see _him_ , scared and alone and pathetic and empty and torn up inside, and that was terrifying. 

Now, it's almost a relief. To be known that deeply. There are still scars and black marks on his soul, but it's still there — _he's_ still here, he survived. And hopefully, he's better now for it.

They were alone for the first time since everything had happened with Dean. And Roman had cut right to the chase, looked him straight in the eyes and said, "Before this happens — before any of this happens — I need you to promise me something."

"Yeah," Seth told him at once. "Anything."

"Promise me you'll never hurt him again."

He didn't stop to think about it, not even for a second. "I won't. I promise." He didn't say, _I'd die first._

"Good," Roman said, like it was all he needed to hear.

"So, this is really happening?" Seth asked, hesitant for the first time.

"I know Dean. He'll do anything for the people he loves. And I'll do anything for him."

Seth had just nodded at him. Sometimes, it's that simple.

*

"That looks good on you," Seth says before he can bite his tongue and just swallow his words. It's hard not to say a lot of the things he wants to say to Dean these days, especially when emotions are running high like right now. So he's just going to blame the excess adrenaline coursing through his bloodstream. God, that had felt good. He can't fucking believe he'd ever given this up. There's nothing that could ever compare to the three of them standing side by side together — no amount of championships or accolades or glory.

Dean just looks down at his chest and shrugs. "Yeah, it's a pretty cool shirt." 

Seth smiles in amusement. He shakes his head. "That's not what I meant. I meant _that_ ," he says, gesturing with one finger. 

"My _face_?" Dean asks. "Yeah, I guess it's not a bad mug."

"No, not your — Your _smile_. I can't remember the last time I saw you this happy." He probably sounds like a complete sap. He probably should have stopped talking about fifteen minutes ago. 

Dean just goes quiet, though, like he's considering that. "Well, it's kind of a big deal." 

"Yeah. It is," Seth agrees earnestly.

"We're really doing this, aren't we?" Dean says, almost in awe, like it's just hit him for the first time.

Seth nods, a ghost of a smile on his lips. He really wants to touch him right now — and sometimes he forgets he's allowed to, sometimes he forgets that Dean's real and solid and right there — so he carefully reaches out and rests his hand on Dean's shoulder. He relaxes under Seth's touch, lets out a breath. He forgets sometimes, that Dean missed this too — the easy touches and casual intimacy. Maybe it's easier to forget, so that he won't ever ask for too much and ruin the trust between them that still feels so fragile, even when every instinct in his body is telling him that this is more right than anything else in the world. It's easier to rely on rationality. At least when it comes to Dean's heart. It's safer this way. 

That's when Roman pokes his head into the room and Seth slowly drops his hand and they both look up at him. 

He just says, "It's time."

They both nod and follow him back out into the arena. Time to go monster hunting.

*

When they get backstage after their dark match, Dean makes a beeline for Roman, a look of utter contentment on his face. And after doing their dorky, endearing handshake, Dean just throws himself into Roman's arms. Roman automatically cradles Dean's head against his shoulder, a wide grin on his own face, and it feels like it lasts a long time — or maybe it's because Seth's just awkwardly standing there watching them.

He knows they're just as happy to be back together again and he feels stupidly fond of both of them right now, but it's times like this that Seth really feels the weight of those three years. Because Roman and Dean have developed their own shorthand that he's still learning to translate. And he's not sure if he's even allowed to enter their inner sanctum. If he even still fits there. It'll take time, he supposes. And adjustment.

Just as he's about to discreetly leave and head to the locker room, Dean slips out of Roman's embrace and turns to Seth.

Seth doesn't move, just narrows his eyes curiously at Dean. Dean's expression doesn't change at all — he just slowly gets closer and closer. And he only has a fraction of a second to figure out what's about to happen before it actually does. Which is Dean leaning in and kissing him on the mouth. 

All things considered, it's probably not that surreal. But it still feels like the most insane thing to ever happen to him. This _definitely_ can't be happening —

Seth just blinks at him helplessly for a few seconds. His first thought is that anyone can just walk in on them right now. His second thought is _Fuck, this feels really good._ His third thought is that maybe he should start kissing back any minute now. 

So, he closes his eyes and shuts out any and all intrusive thoughts. And just lets himself surrender to it.

Dean's mouth is gentle but firm on his own and he doesn't go further than that, just kisses his lips thoroughly until Seth's desperate for more. It feels like just a taste of what's to come. He pulls away far too quickly and just gazes at him in an entrancing way that makes him forget where he is for a moment or two — and the next time he blinks, Dean's gone.

Roman's just staring at him with a raised eyebrow that says, "Guess a lot more has changed than I thought."

Seth gives him a tiny shrug that says he doesn't know what the hell just happened either.

After a minute of silence, Roman just rolls his eyes and huffs a sigh. "So, are you gonna go after him or —"

"Oh, _right_ ," Seth registers quietly and he takes a couple more seconds to figure out how to work his limbs again before rushing down the hallway after Dean.

*

Dean's standing right outside the locker room, almost like he's waiting for him.

"Did you, uh, did you mean that?" he says, voice hoarse like he's forgotten how to use it.

"What?" Dean says, looking genuinely confused.

"Was it real? Or was it just — you know, tonight. All of _this_." It's still terrifying to think about — especially in the light of Dean's current state of bliss and his promise to Roman — but it feels like the most important question he's ever asked. In all his life, Seth's never wanted anything more than this.

Dean shrugs. "I don't know. I did it because I wanted to."

"Oh," Seth says hollowly, feeling his heart beginning to sink.

"I mean," Dean goes on. "It felt right. Doesn't _this_ feel right?" He moves close enough to Seth that their hips and chests are practically flush against each other. He can feel Dean's warmth on his skin. He can feel his breath on his cheek.

"Yeah. Yeah, it does," Seth says, nodding. His throat feels really tight; he's sure he's about to do something really embarrassing. Like cry.

Dean smiles sweetly at him before reaching up and resting his hand on his face, leaning forward to touch their foreheads together. Seth closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.

It feels like it's been hours before Dean speaks again.

"What are you thinking about?" he murmurs, lightly grazing his fingers over Seth's cheek.

"Nothing," Seth replies truthfully, meeting his eyes. "I'm done thinking."

Dean smiles his brightest smile of the night before softly brushing their lips together again.


End file.
